what to say
what to say.
i really have nothing to.
i went on a 24 hour internet break, but i broke the rules by checking facebook on my phone.
my heart hurts tonight. i have this really big feeling that i’m making things bigger than they really are. but it still hurts nonetheless.
……….and no i don’t want to talk about it.
i’ve been watching harry potter all weekend long in preparation for thursday night; when i will be seeing the final installment of the movies. and yes i will be crying. you can just deal with it.
i am purposely not using capital letters tonight.
phil, haylie and i took a walk tonight, just up to the stockdale store, not that far away. it’s a nice store. they have tons of things i would love to have in my dream home.
i enrolled haylie in school today.
…..that makes me sad and proud all in the same breath. my baby. the child i carried, and have held and protected and loved no matter what she has done (cutting her own hair, breaking my new moon hand painted goblet, ripping up my very old fairy tells book, ect, ect) is taking her first real step into the world. next thing i know she’ll be graduating highschool/college, getting married and leaving me. its been an emotional day.
but i know that she will be brilliant no matter what she will do. it’s just hard to know that she isn’t the infant anymore, that she is starting big girl school and will be five….five….wow.
google has this new thing google+…..its the answer to facebook. and the few hours i’ve spent on it, makes me think its utter crap. but i will keep my account, just like i’ve kept my myspace, livejournal, and various other things that i rarely check. i think i’m a hoarder of social media and internet accounts.
i’m so ready and anti ready for school to start back. i’m starting to feel very caged in my home. i need some sort of social life. i need seanna to come over on weds night so we can have game night. or just fun night.
but i am rethinking my schedule for the fall semester. i’m afraid i’m taking on too much. but then again who doesn’t like a challenge. and i would love to graduate in three semesters…unless…
unless i get something i desperately want. and i would post pone graduation for this thing that i want so bad that it sometimes it hurts to breathe.
i’ve been writing all these things down. the other day i redid an entire section of my never-to-be-published novel. made me happy.
….i wish i could write everyday. but alas the words don’t come everyday.
i’m trying very hard to make this 500 words. but i’m at like 467, so i need to have one more thing to say. and since i really have nothing to say, that might be hard.
but then again i’m not sure i care about word count.
comments are loved.
thank you readers whoever you might be tonight.
ps its about ready to storm in a big way. i’m excited.